Saturday, September 29, 2012

Life must be boring...?!?

A dear friend actually tried to put herself in my shoes and imagine what I must feel right now. And I am so grateful for the attempt at understanding that she made, even after she admitted that she can't actually understand how we must feel these days.
She went through the thoughts of how we were expecting Korbin to be here, especially now. And it was supposed to the three of us, but it's still just the two of us. And how boring that must feel when we were so ready to have him with us.
She went on to then try and imagine how I wake up every morning to face the reality that is my life now - empty without him basically - and then realized what a mind trip this is that I'm in now. She then asked, 'how do you change your thinking to accept reality every single day?'
The truth is, I haven't yet. It's why I don't sleep well, and why I don't feel I have much to look forward to any more. Everything was supposed to include Korbin, like the trips we were planning and how we're arranging the house. He became my reason for doing anything and everything in life. So what do I do without him now?
I got a lotta love to give, and I just wish Korbin were here for me to give my love to him.

No comments:

Post a Comment