It's awful to admit, but I can't stand hearing this 'good news' right now. And I don't know when I will be able to stand it. Honestly, even hearing that a close friend is trying again. Really, did you have to share this with me? I have no congrats to offer right now. And it actually kind of pisses me off. Especially as another friend, right in front of me, "do you want a boy?" and of course the other responded that of course she does, she already has a girl. It's a slap in the face. And it's as if everyone around me is rubbing it in how fertile and easy having children and creating a family is...for them. Lucky for them they all get to remain so naive to the harsh realities some of us have to face.
As one mom in support group said, "I have no happiness for myself, how can I have any for you?" Yes, yes, YES. I have been thinking this to myself for quite some time now. Especially as I see joyful updates of anticipated births on Facebook every time I log on. I have now hidden every single happy person on Facebook who can't stop showing off their newborn or new ultrasound pictures or signs of labor. Yup, I don't want to see it at all. Maybe just a tad bit bitter still....
No comments:
Post a Comment