Tradition

Every December Ry and I drive out to Leavenworth, enjoy the snow and all the Christmas lights, buy an ornament (or four) from Kris Kringle and then make the trek back home. This year was supposed to be that plus one, but, it was just the two of us. Despite that we both tried to make the best of it and even had an agenda and list of specifics to find at Kris Kringle. I think we both needed the magic that Leavenworth oozes this time of year.
Seeing the snow at Stevens was beautiful, but it was gone by the time we hit Leavenworth. The 90% chance of precipitation (aka snow) ended up being a crystal clear, sun shiny day. No big deal, we'll eat at Gustav's and then enjoy the lights while shopping around. We were seated in the exact spot we sat in our first trip there ten years ago (well, the first trip was a pass through so I could see the lights then be home to make curfew...).
That was pretty cool for me, plus food and service were good too. But shopping was a total bust. Kris Kringle had absolutely nothing we liked. Normally we find so much we have to pick and choose what to actually get. And on top of that, no lights went on when it got dark! No Santas walking around. No choirs or music. Just us and a bunch of other tourists...with adorable new babies.... So lame.
Emotionally it was a major let down. And we hit traffic on the way back and got cranky and just couldn't wait to be home.
As I write this I feel like this is such a minor day in life to be complaining about because of the many losses of innocent lives in Connecticut earlier today. Such a tragedy. No parent should ever lose a child, no matter the circumstances. It's heart breaking. And yet I still need to have my selfish emotional moment. So many posts on Facebook saying, 'hold your children tight tonight.' Well, I can't do that. So, as my heart goes out to all those who lost someone today, I'm trying to take comfort in holding my Korbin bear to soothe my aching heart and arms. It's selfish but my grief still overwhelms me, and thinking of parents losing children intensifies my grief, brings it all to the surface once again.
And yet somehow, through all the grief, I got a lotta love to give.